The Past and future
Connecting in the present
The weight of it
Causing a heaviness
Boa constrictor like emotion
There truly is
A circle to life
And intersecting point
When the old
Crashes into the new
I’m really good
At putting my
Full weight behind something
Going all in
Selling out
Pushing balance
Beyond its capability
To hold
But yet,
I’m not so good
At sitting in
Processing through
The grief
The pain
The trauma
These things that
Can’t be rushed
Pushed through
Especially the ones
That won’t go away
Those old wounds
Old voices
I’m discovering
They come back up
And sometimes
More loudly
Clanging like kitchen dishes
In the early morning
Do I give them
The attention they need?
The focus they deserve?
Do I honor them?
Or do I move on
Band-aiding them
Hoping they will
Heal themselves
I’m in a season of honesty
Brutal rawness
They have wrestled me
To the ground
Demanding to be heard
Liquifying my resistance
In this moment
I’m learning
To not give up
But rather,
To give in
Learning a deeper level
Of trusting myself
Which in turn
Allowing the love
The kindness
The strength
That is discovered
On the other side
RLove
4.16.21
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