Intimate

Some down and dirty sex.

Slam bam thank you mam.

Or sir.

Is welcomed.

If desperate.

Lasting sex.

Is something desired.

Quickies are a thrill.

But often leave the soul empty.

Tasting of cheese sticks at Applebee’s.

Great going in.

And going down.

Void of sustenance.

Leaving regret behind.

What is lasting sex?

15 minutes?

An hour?

Three hours?

More?

This looks different.

Based on where you’re at

In the sex cycle.

If you aren’t getting any

Then 2- 5

Minutes

Meets the need.

If you are.

But are left wanting.

30 minutes seems great.

What if you actually want more?

More than to “get off”.

A desire burns.

Not just in the loins.

Deep down and core.

That cries out from the beginning.

A yearning.

To give.

And get.

To be seen.

And to see.

To desire.

And be desired.

To discover.

And be discovered.

To risk.

And risked upon.

To play.

And be played with.

To explore.

And be explored.

To invite inside.

And be invited.

To go wild.

And be wild with.

To drink.

And be drank from.

To celebrate.

And be celebrated.

To light the fire.

And have flames stoked.

Giving.

And getting.

Getting.

And giving.

This is a desire.

My desire.

More than just a quick fuck.

More than just religious duty.

More than just a need.

More than just a spousal chore.

More than just a partner’s obligation

Embarking together.

Finding a welcoming place.

Bringing rest.

Bringing understanding.

Bringing a place of belonging.

Home.

Safe to unpack.

Safe to share.

Fear forbidden.

In the end.

Sex.

Is not the outcome.

The act is just the act.

It’s something deep.

The natural wanting to erupt.

Orgasmic beauty awaiting.

Spiritual.

Emotional.

Physical.

A place of delicious intimacy.

Exploring passions.

Removing inhibitions.

Experienced by few.

Desired by many.

Lusted upon by most.

More than getting off.

Or felt up.

Is it possible.

To be naked?

Fully unashamed?

Physically naked?

Yes, we all have a birthday suit.

Emotionally naked?

Difficult.

Feeling no shame?

Damn near impossible.

Thoughts creep in.

Voices drum from the past.

Hidden fears awaken.

You aren’t beauty.

You aren’t enough.

You are disappointment.

A small penis.

Small breasts.

Scars.

Stretch marks.

Cellulite.

Bald spot.

No hair.

A big ass.

No ass.

A mid-section tire.

20, 50, or 100 pounds extra.

OR, OR, OR.

Our minds prattle on.

Endlessly.

Fine-tuned.

Our faults

Focused.

Even worse.

Shamed by past experiences.

Worse yet.

Blaming yourself.

For being taken advantage of.

Perversely used.

In past abuse.

In the end.

It is not about sex.

But it is about sex.

If your understanding.

Sex is all that.

One with you.

A reflective impression.

Soul mate.

One that will not vanish.

Rick Ellsmore

10.10.18 & 12.15.18